A Fateful Rainy Day
by Mediterranean May
Summary: My first ever fanfic, so please be kind! Not completely original. Warning: This is RemusSirius slash. Rated T to be safe. Wow, summaries really are hard!
1. Chapter 1

The rain, which had started as a light drizzle in the morning, was now hammering on the windowpane, making an obscenely forceful racket. This was doing absolutely nothing, Remus decided, to aid in his concentration on his schoolwork. Lily was sitting across from him in a secluded corner of the library, chewing idly on her quill while trying to look up a charm for their homework in an old dusty tome.

Remus continued to stare out the window, rather hypnotized by the drumming of the rain. The sky outside was a stormy gray. _Just like Sirius' eyes, though storm clouds can hardly do them justice,_ thought Remus.

"Remus. Reeeemuuuusss. Remus!," said Lily, thwacking him sharply on the head with her quill.

"What the bloody hell was that for?!," said Remus indignantly, though it had hardly hurt him at all.

"I found the charm and I thought it only polite that I notify you of that fact. However, that's a rather difficult task when you're staring off into La-La-Land, smiling like an idiot." Lily replied lightly.

"I was smiling?"

"Yes, and drooling a little too."

"Was not!"

"Okay, maybe not drooling, but you were grinning like a love-sick fool."

"Was not!"

Lily simply gave him her best incredulous stare. He never could lie to her. Sometimes he could swear she was using Legilimency to break into his every thought. It was more than a little creepy.

"Fine, I'm slobbering like an eleven year old girl with a crush, now can we just finish our charms homework?" Remus said exasperatedly.

"Only if you stop thinking about Sirius long enough to finish."

Lily was the only one Remus had told he was gay. She was also the only one he had confided in that he was in love with the most handsome, charismatic, and most sought after boy in Hogwarts. Anyone else would have laughed at him or been disgusted, but Lily almost made him believe that he had a chance. Lily was wonderful at making him feel better about himself, even if she was only feeding him bullshit. Well, he appreciated it all the same.

Remus was just about to comply when he heard a familiar voice call him. Sirius always seemed to show up whenever Remus was thinking about him, a fact Remus had always found rather disconcerting.

"Oy, Moony! Help me with my Astronomy charts, will you?," called Sirius, swaggering over to their table.

"I've just remembered, I'm supposed to meet James in a few moments. See you later Remus." Lily said hurriedly, gathering her things haphazardly, and dashing off.

"But…" Remus did not want to be alone with the object of his affections at the moment, mostly because he did not trust himself. He watched as Lily strode away and Sirius plunked himself down in her seat.

"Strange girl. Never could see what Prongs makes all the fuss about." Sirius said as he spread the astronomy charts out before them on the tabletop.

"Sirius Black in the library. I never thought I would ever bear witness to such a momentous occasion as this!," teased Remus.

"Only for you Moony, only for you," Sirius said, winking at him in a mock seductive manner that made Remus swoon. He then bent over his charts, finding where to start.

Remus couldn't help but notice, in such close proximity, the way Sirius' glossy, black hair fell into his silvery gray eyes and clung to those thick, black eyelashes. Remus' eyes fell next onto Sirius' pale, full lips. Sirius was licking them, almost as though he was purposefully taunting Remus, enticing him to claim those lips with his own.

"Rem, you all right? You seem a bit glazed over, mate. Did Snivellus jinx you or something? If he did, I swear I'll curse him into next year!" said Sirius, his eyes glinting in the dull candlelight.

"Calm down Sirius. I'm just a bit tired is all."

"Well, can't blame you. Tuesday's transformation was a bit more rigorous than normal."

"Yeah, it was," said Remus, grateful for the excuse. He'd better watch himself, or else he'd wind up pouncing on Sirius from across the table. _I'll just help him as fast as I can, then I'll make up an excuse and leave._

"Well, anyway," continued Sirius, "I'm having a spot of trouble finding these constellations…"

But Remus wasn't really listening. His eyes strayed again to the chiseled features of his best friend, the contour of his jaw line, that impossibly perfect nose…

"Wait, Moony don't move, you've got an eyelash." Sirius raised his hand to Remus' face and gingerly pinched the eyelash off his cheek. "Make a wish!" said Sirius playfully. Remus closed his eyes, and then blew the lash off of Sirius' finger. "What did you wish for?"

"If I told you it won't come true."

"Who says?"

"I says."

"Now Moony, that isn't proper grammar."

"Like you're one to talk, your grammar is atrocious. I think you can let me slide just this once."

Remus looked then into Sirius' face and their eyes locked. Sirius was staring at him intensely. Remus felt himself grow hot, his heart pounded in his chest. He prayed Sirius couldn't hear it. Remus didn't know if he was imagining it or not, but Sirius seemed to draw slowly closer, a primitive gleam in his eyes, closing the gap between them…

Suddenly Sirius sprang back and whipped his head around to where a series of giggles were emitted from behind the bookshelves followed by scattered retreating footsteps. This seemed to snap Sirius back into reality, a scared look passing over his features.

"Rem, let's just work on this back in the common room later, where we won't be bothered," said Sirius as he gathered his things and stood to leave.

"Sure thing Padfoot," said Remus uncertainly as he watched Sirius stalk away. Remus felt as though he were in a daze. What had just happened? Or rather, what almost happened? Had Sirius almost kissed him? He would never know now. Remus had never hated Sirius' fan club more than at that moment.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Don't own it.

Author's Note: Well, I hope you all enjoyed chapter one! I'm actually quite proud of myself for finally starting a fanfic. Now I just have to finish it… I know every author says this, but please review! Even flames, just as long as I get some sort of feedback! There will be one more chapter after this second one, and should be up shortly.

After making sure he was at least a quarter of a mile away from that horrible library, Sirius leaned against the stone wall of a deserted corridor and slowly slid down until he was sitting on the floor.

_What was I thinking?_ thought Sirius. _Remus is not interested in me romantically and he sure as hell isn't gay! I'm going to ruin our friendship one of these days, if I didn't already._

Sirius had had feelings of the romantic sort for the adorable werewolf ever since he had hit puberty in second year. He was now a sixth year. That was nearly five years he had wasted mooning over Moony (A/N: No pun intended! Okay, yes it was…) and he had always known his feelings would not be reciprocated. Even if they were returned, he still didn't think he'd be able to do anything about it. His parents would surely disown him, probably right after they killed him, and his reputation as the clever, handsome, prankster and not to mention Hogwart's resident playboy, would be unceremoniously torn to shreds. Even though he was not remotely attracted to girls, they would have to do until he graduated, perhaps even longer than that. It was a grim prospect, but he wouldn't risk losing his friends, who had become more like family than anything.

He decided that he needed a girlfriend, or at least a nameless girl to snog for a half hour to restore his sense of masculinity.

And then the perfect opportunity presented itself. Or herself, to be exact…

Elsie Langdon was, Sirius deduced, the founder of his fan club and probably about ten times more obsessed with him than any other girl in the school. She was attractive with long blonde hair and blue eyes. She was also probably one of the dumbest girls in school, a Hufflepuff with marks so bad she was forced to retake fifth year instead of going on to sixth with Sirius. It was this fact that made Sirius feel a twang of pity for her, even though he found her extremely obnoxious. However, at the present moment, he had never been happier to see her in his life.

Once he saw her turn the corner, he jumped up from his seat on the floor, and said, "Hey Elsie! What are you doing here on this wonderful day?" He swaggered towards her and added a seductive wink for good measure.

"Hello Sirius! What a pleasant surprise to run into you here!" cried Elsie.

Sirius could tell, however, that she was not in the least surprised, and had, in fact, run into him accidentally-on-purpose. Besides, he was almost certain it was her head of shining blonde hair he saw whipping out of sight following her shrill giggle in the library. But these trivial things hardly mattered at the moment because Sirius was on a mission.

She sidled over to him, a dreamy sort of grin plastered on her face, batting her eyelashes. He turned on that Black charm and set to work flirting with her. It was only five or ten minutes before he had her against the wall, his lips glued to hers. It definitely wasn't what Sirius could consider enjoyable (her lips felt too soft and mushy, her pungent perfume invading his nostrils) but it was something he felt compelled to do, to feel like a man. _This is wrong_ the little voice in Sirius' head told him. _You're using her and you're lying to yourself._ Sirius finally managed to pull away from her with a wet smack. He opened his mouth to make an excuse to leave, but then he saw something out of the corner of his eye that made his words catch in his throat.

Remus was standing stock still at the end of the corridor, his mouth partially open from surprise, his eyes unreadable. He seemed to snap out of his reverie when he made eye contact with Sirius, and said breathlessly, "Sorry, I'll just…go…" He then hurriedly whipped around the corner and out of sight.

"Shit," said Sirius bitterly as he continued to gaze at the abandoned corridor.

"What's wrong honey bear?" said Elsie, gazing stupidly at his worried face.

"Sorry, but I've got to go," said Sirius in a deadpan tone. He left Elsie standing alone in the corridor while he set off to find James.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Still don't own it.

Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! This is my last chapter, though I may still write a sequel one of these days.

Sirius flew along corridor after corridor, making his way to the Gryffindor common room. When he reached the portrait hole, he clambered in and scanned the room for James. Lily, who was sitting in an armchair by the fire with a ridiculously thick book open on her lap, looked up when he came in.

Lowering her eyes to her book once again, she said, "If you're looking for James, he's up in the dorm."

Sirius didn't acknowledge her statement but raced up the stairs to the boys' dorms. He threw open the door and found James talking animatedly to Peter, who was laughing at something James had said. They looked around when he entered, their smiles slipping from their faces at Sirius' expression.

"What's wrong Padfoot?" inquired James. Sirius only looked pointedly at Peter, who still sat there gaping silently at him.

"Fine, I'll leave!" grumbled Peter, "No one ever bloody tells me anything!" Sirius felt bad for making him leave like that, but he was hardly comfortable making this confession to James, let alone Peter. As Peter slammed the door upon his exit, Sirius crossed the room and sat on the bed next to James.

"Tell me what's wrong Sirius," repeated James, concern etched heavily in his voice. James had never seen Sirius look this uncomfortable before. He was pale, slightly sweaty, and looking around the dorm as though in search of some sort of comfort. James slid closer to Sirius and put his arm around his shoulder. "Tell me what's wrong," he said again, a little more forcefully this time.

"There's so much to tell you, and I don't quite know where to start," said Sirius, looking slightly overwhelmed.

"It's okay Padfoot," said James reassuringly, "just gather your thoughts for a moment and breathe." They sat in silence for what seemed an eternity for both, until Sirius finally blurted out, "Maybe I should start with the fact that…the fact that…"

He couldn't do this. If he told James, James would hate him. No, James was like a brother to him, he could never hate him. But what if this was the one thing that could undo their friendship? Well, there was only one way to find out.

Sirius took a deep breath, resolved himself, and said, "James, I'm… I'm gay." There it was. He did it. He looked at James' face. "Oh," was all that he said.

"Is that really all that you can say? Oh?" said Sirius, his heart bashing against his rib cage.

"It's fine Sirius, just a bit of a shock is all," said James finally with a small smile as Sirius gave an audible sigh of relief. "I mean, it's just hard to believe, you're so…"

"What? Manly, handsome, suave…"

"Tall," interjected James.

At this they both burst out laughing. "Tall, James? It's hard to believe that I'm a pouf because I'm tall," said Sirius incredulously. "I guess so," laughed James.

"You took this a lot better than I expected," said Sirius, a bit more seriously this time (A/N: I know, I need to quit the name puns). "What did you expect me to do, run away screaming and then return with torch wielding villagers?!" said James, "I'm your best mate Sirius, I love you like a brother. You'd have to do a lot more than be queer for me to hate you."

This statement touched Sirius in a profound way that James would never know how much. "Thanks James," said Sirius.

"Don't mention it," said James, squeezing his shoulder slightly.

"There's more," blurted Sirius.

"Isn't there always?"

"Shut up James."

"I'm listening."

"Well, here goes…I'm desperately in love with one of my best friends."

"…"

"James?"

"Sirius, I'm flattered, but you see, I'm with Lily…"

"Not you, you dung head! Like your ego needs any more inflating with my declarations of undying love and devotion."

"Right," said James. His face was slightly red from embarrassment. "Well," he continued, "if it's not me, I know it's definitely not Peter, bless his soul…" Suddenly, James' eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. "Bloody hell, why didn't I see it before?!"

"See what James?" said Sirius even though he knew very well what.

"You fancy Moony!" exclaimed James, turning towards him and pointing his finger dangerously close to his right eye.

"Good job Sherlock!"

"Who's Sherlock?"

"I don't know, but Remus always uses that saying when he wants to be sarcastic."

"Oh, okay. But anyway, back on topic. I can't believe I didn't realize it before! I always thought there was something strange about how you would stare at Moony when you thought no one was watching, or how you're more gentle with him than with me and Pete."

"You noticed all that?" said Sirius, slightly worried.

"But don't worry," said James quickly, cottoning on, "no one else noticed, or even if they did, no one suspects anything."

"That's good."

"Actually, now that I think about it, Moony acts the same way around you."

"He does not. And even if he did, that's just the way Remus is, it's not like it means anything."

"I think you should tell him."

"I might consider that if I hadn't already made an arse out of myself today."

"What do you mean?"

Sirius launched into the story about the library and Elsie Langdon.

"If he really does feel the same about me, I've probably broken his heart and now he hates me," finished Sirius.

"Sirius, it's Moony. Moony doesn't hate anyone, especially you."

"Tell me what I should do James."

"I still think you should tell him."

"All right then. Give me the map, so I can find him. Let's get this over with," said Sirius resigning himself for the worst. James handed him the Marauder's Map ("I solemnly swear that I am up to no good") and Sirius scanned the castle for Remus, but he was nowhere to be found. Then, a little black dot labeled "Remus Lupin" caught his eye. "Why's he outside? It's been pouring rain all day!" said Sirius. He must have upset Remus more than he thought.

Remus didn't know how long he had been sitting by the lake, but by the way his clothes were completely soaked through, he deduced it must have been a long time. What surprised him was that he really didn't care. He felt completely numb. Why had he been dumb enough to even hope that Sirius might love him back? He had finally convinced himself to confront Sirius, but when he had happened upon him kissing that girl, all such hope had dissipated. He knew that Sirius snogged girls, but seeing it was something entirely different. He imagined that having his heart ripped out and then stomped on would feel about the same. He wished vaguely to be struck by lightening so that he would never have to face Sirius again. What had he gotten himself into? Why couldn't he just stop loving Sirius? Why couldn't he feel normal in any aspect of his life?

He was so caught up in these miserable thoughts that he hadn't noticed that Sirius was there until he sat down next to him. Remus jumped slightly and mumbled a greeting.

"You shouldn't be out here Rem, you'll catch cold." Sirius was now just about as wet as Remus. He couldn't help but marvel at how absolutely gorgeous Sirius looked with his shirt clinging to his body in all the right places, rivulets of rain water cascading down his face. How would he ever get over Sirius?

"Somehow, it really doesn't seem to matter." Remus paused to let Sirius say something, but when he didn't, he stole himself to say what was really on his mind and he continued, "I'm tired of hiding my feelings all the time, so I'm just going to say it. I love you Sirius Black. More than anything in the world. And it hurts so much because I know that you're straight and I can never have you. If you want to never talk to me again and hate me, I'll understand completely." Remus' eyes had welled with tears, which were now streaming down his face, mingling with the rain. He closed his eyes and braced himself for harsh words or maybe a fist colliding with the side of his face. He was shocked, then, when he felt two warm thumbs wiping away his tears.

He opened his eyes and saw Sirius, tears flowing as freely as Remus', looking him in the eye. "I'm not as straight as you'd think. In fact, I'm the complete opposite, and I've hated myself for it. The only reason I kissed her was because of those insecurities, but I'm so goddamned tired of being insecure! And I love you too, Remus Lupin. More than anything." Sirius finally bridged the gap between them and claimed Remus' lips with his own. Neither had ever felt anything better in their lives. Sirius marveled at how much better it was to kiss Remus than a girl. His lips, instead of soft and mushy, were firm and sweet and tasted of chocolate and rain water. They lay a long time kissing in the rain, both feeling that they had finally found home in each other's arms.

The End!

Author's Note: Well thanks for reading, I hope you've all enjoyed it. I'm quite proud of myself for finishing a story. I couldn't have done it without all your lovely reviews! The end wasn't too sappy, was it? I do like happy endings.


End file.
